sometimes you're flush...

sometimes you're flush and sometimes you're bust. and when you're up, it's never as good as it seems. and when you're down, you never think you'll be up again. but life goes on...

this summer has been one hell of a ride. ups and downs, manic and dull, everything happening with nothing occurring. i've found myself in the thick of things and situations i had left hundreds of miles behind... and i'm having to face them on my own.

i have always thought of myself as an independent person. in fact, i have a tendency to be too independent for my own good at times. however, i am realizing i still depend on others way too much for self-assurance. when hard times hit, i really need someone to turn to for an encouraging word. 

i guess that's not necessarily a bad thing, but i know it really should be God i turning to, not friends. 

so here He's placed me, in the thick of it, juggling all this solo. although i know i have people to fall back on, the matter of the fact is almost all of them are hundreds of miles away and have their own lives to live. so i suppose this is a lesson in being truly independent. or rather, truly dependent on Him.